Escape Pod - Sci-Fi Audio

By Greg van Eekhout.
Read by Stephen Eley.

I launched into my next bit, which I’d rehearsed that morning on the tram. “What I liked about your stories is that you never knew where they were going. It’d start off as a World War II military adventure, but then it would wind up being about android worms from another dimension out to steal Earth’s dirt. It’s like other writers’ stories are bridges: There’s a beginning, there’s an end, and it’s a pretty straight shot through. It might be a long bridge, or curvy, maybe, so you can’t quite see the ending coming. But the trip basically makes sense. Your stories were different, though. You always blew up your bridges halfway across, and you’d have to swim for the banks, and you’d end up on some rock with weird lizards.”

On the verge of laughter, he looked at me. “You’re kidding, right?”

Rated R. Contains profanity and a disturbing resemblance to Philip K. Dick.

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Referenced sites:
Eley’s writing progress
New forums (finally!)

A film by Stefen Fangmeier.

Reviewed by Jonathon Sullivan.

Download the Escape Pod Review.

By Robert Silverberg.

Read by J.C. Hutchins (of The 7th Son Trilogy).

Mike offered Nick some pot. “That’s really something,” he said. “To have gone to the end of the world. Hey, Ruby, maybe we’ll talk to the travel agent about it.”

Nick took a deep drag and passed the joint to Jane. He felt pleased with himself about the way he had told the story. They had all been very impressed. That swollen red sun, that scuttling crab. The trip had cost more than a month in Japan, but it had been a good investment. He and Jane were the first in the neighborhood who had gone. That was important.

Rated R. Contains drugs, swinging, and frequent gratuitous apocalypses.

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Referenced sites:
Podiobooks.com
Starship Sofa (incl.: Robert Silverberg)

By Mur Lafferty.

Read by Stephen and Anna Eley.

Musical guest: Twisted Sister.

“Look, I think I know where this is going,” Kris Kringle said, but Gingermuffin cut him off.

“Do you? The Heartbreakers have been making Tom Petty sound good for years, and no one gives a damn. Tom Petty gets all of the credit.”

Kris wondered if he was sober enough to have this discussion. “You’re not talking about Tom Petty.”

Gingermuffin slammed his hand down on the table. “Damn right I’m not!” Kris’s carefully stacked poker chips fell over in a clatter of
Christmas.

Rated R. Contains profanity, violence, and the puncturing of childhood myths. Merry Christmas!

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Referenced sites:
Reading is Fundamental
Child’s Play
I Should Be Writing
Geek Fu Action Grip
Podsafe Music Network (Terms of Use)

By Tobias S. Buckell.

Read by Steve Anderson (SGA Creative and Great Tales Live).

Roger sighed, shifted his position on the stump, and then turned back away from Marcus.

“What I’m trying to do, Marcus, is talk that tree into moving.”

Marcus didn’t say anything. He stood behind someone he thought he once knew and tried to figure what to say next. Not a man normally tied for words, Marcus found himself in the very surreal position of being speechless.

Rated R. For profanity and somewhat wooden anatomical descriptions.

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By Daniel Schwabauer.

Read by Jared Axelrod (of The Voice of Free Planet X) and J.R. Blackwell (of Voices of Tomorrow).

The world we now occupy is red, fourth from its sun, and extreme in its temperature. The atmosphere is lethal. Without our shelters we would die. But we will not be here long. Already the attack-cylinders, loaded with machinery and the weapons of destruction, stand ready in the firing tubes. Soon I shall be sending you thoughts from the third planet.

I have loved you.

Rated PG. Contains violence, chemical warfare, and heavy moral themes.

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Today’s Sponsor:

2005 Hugo Winner!

By Mike Resnick.

Read by Stephen Eley.

That night I was faced with a major decision. I didn’t want
to read a book called Travels With My Cats by a woman called
Miss, but I’d spent my last nickel on it — well, the last until
my allowance came due again next week — and I’d read all my other
books so often you could almost see the eyetracks all over them.

So I picked it up without much enthusiasm, and read the first
page, and then the next — and suddenly I was transported to Kenya
Colony and Siam and the Amazon. Miss Priscilla Wallace had a
way of describing things that made me wish I was there, and when I
finished a section I felt like I’d been there.

Rated PG. This product may be too disillusioning for young children.

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Referenced sites:
PodDisc.com
DragonHearth Productions (by Tracy and Laura Hickman)

A film by Darren Aronofsky.

Reviewed by Jonathon Sullivan.


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By Nancy Kress.

Read by Christiana Ellis (of Nina Kimberly the Merciless and Pickle Tales)

She said, “What the project needs is for you to come back and work on the same small area you did originally. Looking for something–anything–you might have missed in the protein-coded instructions to successive generations of nanoassemblers.”

“No,” I said.

Rated PG. Contains minor profanity, explicit bodily functions, and people being very, very mean..

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Referenced sites:
PodDisc.com
Podholes!

As promised in the past couple of episodes, our online storefront for selling podcast archive CDs is (finally!) up and running at PodDisc.com. This is your chance to get all of your holiday shopping done in one place — provided everyone you know wants over 45 hours of science fiction short stories on CD.

What do the discs look like? I’m glad you asked. They look like this:





Beautiful, isn’t it? And for a very slight fee, you can have your own personal message put on the CD. You can buy each disc for $10 or a bundle of all three collections for $25. Shipping is a cheap flat rate in the U.S. (and tolerable everywhere else), and satisfaction is guaranteed.

Right now only Escape Pod CDs are available, but once the business model proves viable I plan to open this up to producing archive discs for other podcasters. If that’s a service you’d be interested in, drop me a line and I’ll give you more details.

And remember: If you’ve donated $20 or more to Escape Pod this year, or if you’re a subscriber, don’t buy yet! I’ll be sending details to you in e-mail on how you can get this stuff for free.

…Right after I get some sleep.

By Jeffrey R. DeRego.
Read by Rich Sigfrit (of Requiem of the Outcast and Amazing Pulp Adventures).

"Which one are you?"

The kid fans out a small stack of super hero trading cards, but it's not a Union deck. Figures. "Lemme see what you got there." I flip through and remember my old baseball card collection. I knew there was something special about me, when at nine-years-old, I accurately calculated the probable batting stats of each player, on every team, in the 1996 season after opening only one pack. The Union recruited me five years later after my dad beat a couple of Atlantic City casinos for ten million bucks. I was caught on security camera tape telling him when and how to bet at the roulette wheel.

"These don't look like you."

The card displays a blue-costumed man leaping between buildings. I hand it back to him. "Those guys aren't real, but I am." Wow. Did I just say that? Maybe I'll tell the kid that Santa and the Easter Bunny aren't real either. He's staring at me now, I can almost see his little brain struggling to make sense of my answer. I should tell him to buy Union Cards but, you know, he's five.

Rated R. Contains profanity, some violence involving children, and retail corporate exploitation.


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Union Dues Stories:
EP027: Iron Bars and the Glass Jaw
EP049: Off White Lies
EP062: The Baby and the Bathwater

By Heather Shaw.
Read by Stephen Eley.

"Look, miss, I'm going to have to cut your hair to do this. Is that all right?"

She smiled at him from her upside-down, bent-over position, so he took that as a yes. He found an old pair of garden shears and took a hunk of her hair, gathered it into a rough ponytail, and hacked it off.

A pair of mountain bluebirds flew out from where the nest of hair had been.

Rated PG. Contains non-explicit sex, accidental assault, and geological scatology.


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A film by Christopher Nolan.

Reviewed by Mark Anderson.

Download the Escape Pod Review.

By Robert J. Sawyer.
Read by Stephen Eley.

The Pioneer Spirit was a colonization ship; it wasn’t intended as a diplomatic vessel. When it had left Earth, it had seemed important to get at least some humans off the mother world. Two small-scale nuclear wars—Nuke I and Nuke II, as the media had dubbed them—had already been fought, one in southern Asia, the other in South America. It appeared to be only a matter of time before Nuke III, and that one might be the big one.

SETI had detected nothing from Tau Ceti, at least not by 2051. But Earth itself had only been broadcasting for a century and a half at that point; Tau Ceti might have had a thriving civilization then that hadn’t yet started using radio. But now it was twelve hundred years later. Who knew how advanced the Tau Cetians might be?

Rated PG. Contains minor profanity, and very tame references to populating new worlds. Hey, someone's got to.


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By Paul S. Jenkins. (of The Rev Up Review).
Read by Mur Lafferty (of Geek Fu Action Grip).

There was a group of them at college who were into Satanism. My mom, Betty Bloxham as she was then, was one of them. It all sounds a bit kinky, going into the woods at dead of night and dancing in the nude under the full moon.

Anyway, they were all high on drugs at the time, so I doubt they knew what they were doing.

Rated R. Contains sexual violence, Satanic summonings, and similar wholesome family bonding.


Download the Escape Pod Flash.

A film by Christian Volckman.

Reviewed by Jonathon Sullivan.



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By Stephen Dedman.
Read by Benjamin Grundy (of Mysterious Universe).

"I suppose you think we turn into cats and foxes when your back is turned?"

I smiled. "Only some of you - you, for example. You're much too beautiful to be human, but you could be a cat, a flower, a tree - no, scratch that one, you're too short." I glanced at Hiroshi. "Maybe Shimako's the tree-spirit," I said, softly. Hiroshi ignored me, but Miyume covered her mouth and laughed.

"I assure you, I'm quite human," she said. "I don't doubt that Shimako is, too. And how many girls have you used that line on, before?"

Rated R. Contains explicit sexual content. And ghosts. Explicit sexual ghosts, really.


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Referenced sites:
Retrieval Detachment

From SciFi Wire:
Apparently the new animated film, Flushed Away, has a lot of SFF in-jokes. Be sure to look for Han Solo in the fridge.
http://www.scifi.com/scifiwire/index.php?id=38664

Robert Silverberg plans on compiling his fiction into nine volumes, the first titled To Be Continued.
http://www.scifi.com/scifiwire/index.php?id=38651

By Stephen Eley.
Read by Maia Whitaker (of Knitwitch's SciFi/Fantasy Zone)

"Do I know you?" she says.

"I remember you," he says, and she smiles. It's another game. He has been a spy fleeing his country. She has been an adulterous First Lady. They have been psychiatrist and schizophrenic; vampire and victim; two blind people speculating on the world they cannot see. They will make love as themselves when they leave the Rose for a room upstairs, and tomorrow he will finish his business and leave her city. But first they dine as other people.


Rated R. Contains sex, violence, sacrilege, and other epic necessities.


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Referenced sites:
Twenty Epics (Amazon link)
Twenty Epics (PDF download)
Silent Universe

By Nancy Kress.
Read by Martha Holloway (of the ADD Cast and Podiobooks Pro)

“I like the taste of home-grown tomatoes,” I tell him. “Ones at the Safeway taste like wallpaper.”

“But nano won’t make tomatoes that taste processed,” he says in that way that men like to correct women. “That machinery will make the best tomatoes this town ever tasted.”

“Well, I hope you’re right.” Then Will and Kimee spilled their fight out through the screen door into the back yard, and Jackie started whimpering on his blanket, and I didn’t have no time for any nanomachinery.

Rated R. Contains violence, brief sexual violence, and minor profanity.


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Today's Sponsor:


Referenced sites:
"The Coming Technological Singularity," by Vernor Vinge